I want to be a Chinese Mother

I have a lot to do tonight to get ready for our trip to the mitten this weekend. But I thought I'd sneak a little post in before I get started on the fixing dinner, cleaning, ironing, packing and planning that is in store for me this evening. (5 hours later...scratch all of that, I didn't do any of it yet...we had a friend in town and we went out to dinner with him and he just left. It might be a late late night.)

I love that through the internet and sites like Twitter, I can find articles I would have never even happened across. Like one I read today, that made me want to be a Chinese mother. But not as extreme as the mother who wrote "Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior."

If you don't want to read the whole article, I'll try to sum it up for you in a couple sentences. I really think you should the whole article though.

The author is trying to say that all parents want what's best for their child. Western parents however are very worried about their children's self esteem and how they will feel if they fail at something, they want everything to be fun even if they are bad it or are losing. Chinese parents on the other hand assume their child is strong, not fragile, and can handle being told they're not doing good enough, without it making their son or daughter have self esteem issues.

So, what parts of the Chinese mother philosophy do I want to embrace?

• Assuming our child is strong and not fragile
  

  "Western parents worry a lot about their children's self-esteem. But as a parent, one of the worst things you can do for your child's self-esteem is to let them give up. On the flip side, there's nothing better for building confidence than learning you can do something you thought you couldn't." 

• Practice makes perfect, nothing is fun until you're good at it

"What Chinese parents understand is that nothing is fun until you're good at it. To get good at anything you have to work, and children on their own never want to work, which is why it is crucial to override their preferences. This often requires fortitude on the part of the parents because the child will resist; things are always hardest at the beginning, which is where Western parents tend to give up."

• Preparing our child for the future 

"Chinese believe that the best way to protect their children is by preparing them for the future, letting them see what they're capable of, and arming them with skills, work habits and inner confidence that no one can ever take away."

As I was reading this earlier and again now as I type this, I think about my childhood and how my parents actually had some of the same philosophies as Chinese parents. Specifically, this one time when my dad, for the lack of a better term, made of me for my little sister knowing her times tables better than me and forcing us to flash cards. There are other examples, but this post is already getting long and I have stuff to do.

Not to mention, that after discussing this with the hubby, I have to convince him that I have no intent to be as extreme as the author :)

The Story

Reading the Bible in entirety is on my 25 Before Twenty-Five List. I had started the year off on the right track to finishing it within the year, but then around mid February, I fell way behind in my reading. A few weeks later, as I was talking to one of my small group members about my struggle, and how I really wanted to read the entire Bible, not just because it was on my list, but also because in my almost 20 years of being a Christian, I had never read the whole thing. She suggested I read The Story (overview below).

 "God has gone to great lengths to rescue lost and hurting people. That is what The Story is all about—the story of the Bible, God’s great love affair with humanity. Condensed into 31 accessible chapters, The Story sweeps you into the unfolding progression of Bible characters and events from Genesis to Revelation. Using the clear, accurate, and easy-to-understand text of Today’s New International Version, it allows the stories, poems, and teachings of the Bible to read like a novel. And like any good story, The Story is filled with intrigue, drama, conflict, romance, and redemption."

After starting the book and talking to her a bit more about it, I decided I would allow reading The Story to be a substitute for my list. I still fully intend on reading the Bible cover to cover, just at my own pace, instead of following a mapped out reading plan. Reading it really made me view Christ in a new light, and I could go into a lot of revelations I had while reading, but that would be another post in itself. If you want to read the Bible and like me, were struggling to get through it, want to get a better grasp on the order of events, or just want to learn more about God's grace, I highly recommend reading it.

I finally finished it today! And so I get to cross of #12 Read the Bible in Entirety off of my 25 Before Twenty-Five List! It's such a great feeling anytime I get to cross something off.

Budget Update

Timmy and I survived our first month living on a budget. We're very proud of ourselves. And we ended the month excited to take on month number two.

There were only two areas that we spent more than we had budgeted. And a few that we over budgeted, so we actually ended up having money "left over." The main area we under budgeted was gas. I don't drive, so I relied on Tim to give me an amount to enter into our spreadsheet. He forgot I was driving to Michigan for a weekend. Driving to MI equals about 2 extra tanks of gas, my daddy filled up my car before I left, so thanks to him, we didn't actually go over budget much. He's the best! I also forgot to budget in the dang insurance we have on Tim's phone. I've tried on multiple occasions to talk him out of having it, but he insists.

April is going to be a little tricky. We have a couple of days where we'll be going out with some friends, and we've got dinner plans with a couple from our church. So we're going to have to stretch our "dining out" money. You might that that's a pretty specific category, but the spreadsheet we use, breaks down general categories, like "Food" into "groceries" and "dining out." That way it's easier to know where you can cut and where you're expenses our fixed.

Wish us luck as we continue our journey to Financial Peace.

Niceness

It has been quiet awhile since I blogged about the NICE Assignments, that I used to do. Actually, I still do some of them and other nice things, just have shared. But this morning, I wanted to share a nice little story with you.

A couple of weeks ago, Timmy got home from work late. A man had showed up at Midas (where Tim works) after they had closed, wanting a light bulb installed. Tim had just finished up all of the closing stuff, but told the guy he could quickly install it for him at no charge. After the new light bulb was in, the man tried to give Tim some money, but didn't have any cash and wanted to write him a check for $10. Tim told him that it was really alright, and if he wanted to repay him to just continue bringing his car there for service.

Yesterday, Tim came home from work and asked me if I remembered him telling me the story. Of course I did, because I was impressed with how nice he had been. Well, that same man had came back by the store. He had came back to give Tim a gift certificate to his restaurant, Fleming's Prime Steakhouse $ Wine Bar, a pretty fancy place downtown. And the gift certificate wasn't just for like a free appetizer or something (although that would have been just as nice). It's for $50! Also, I guess it can be kind of tough to get reservations there, so the guy gave Tim his business card and told him to call him if he had trouble getting a table. All of this for taking 15 minutes and installing a light bulb!

You know what they say, what goes around, comes around. It pays to be nice people.

April Love List

Happy Friday, April Fool's Day and Cub's home opener! No, I'm not really that big of Cub's fan, but hey it works. It's a new month and hopefully it brings some warmer weather. I don't know about you, but I am sick and tired of wearing my my bulky winter coat.

APRIL LOVE LIST

• Spring is here (I say this hesitantly - see above)
• I'm officially in my second trimester. Yay for no more nausea and more energy!
• We get to see Tim's family. We haven't seen them since Christmas :(
• Resurrection Day a.k.a Easter. It's one of my favorite holidays. Remember, Jesus is the reason for this season too.
• Speaking of Easter, awhile ago Tim and I raided the dollar bin at Target for some Easter-ish stuff to send to our nieces for Easter, and I'll finally get to it mail to them!
• We might be going to see an old teacher of mine play a show at Uncommon Ground in Wrigleyville
• We should be launching the Dwellevate website early this month (this has been a LONG time coming, and I'll be glad when it's launched)

Design Design Design

I have a few of design projects I'm starting!! All 3 of them are invitations, and since it's my dream to make a living from design wedding and occasional invitations, I'm very excited to take on these projects.

First on my to do list, are two open house invitations. One for my little brother, I can hardly believe he's graduating this year. The other is for a the daughter of a close family friend. I'm very excited to work on both of them. I've started sketching and think I have a concept for both :) I'll give you all a sneak peek when they're finished!

My third project (and the one I'm MOST excited about) are my littlest sister's wedding invitations. Her and her prince (this is what she calls him) are getting married in August. I've done a few rough sketches, but I'm still waiting for the "ah ha" moment. So far, my sketches are looking way too similar to the inspiration pieces. And we can't have any of that. Below are three invites we're using as inspiration, pulling one or two things from each of them.

The wording is going to be a lot like #1. Loving the line "almost as thrilling is the opportunity to invite those we love, like and patiently tolerate"

I'll be mixing typefaces and using lines, shapes and glyphs like in #1 and #2

The RSVP card, or should I say cards will be similar to #3

Her colors are very different from the ones above - yellow (think sunshine and marigolds, not baby chicks and Easter eggs) red (think candied apples) and blue (I think this is more of a turquoise/aqua blue, but I should probably check with her on that one).


invite links here

#1 thing I should NOT do while pregnant

Normally, I love Facebook. But I'm beginning to think that while I'm pregnant I shouldn't be on there. Why? Because it seems that a TON of my female FB friends are also pregnant, and their statuses usually have to do with their pregnancies, and then I inevitably find myself comparing mine to theirs.

This has already lead to me having one nightmare. You see there is one girl, who is a few weeks behind me, who has already heard her baby's heart beat. I haven't heard our belly monster's heart beat yet, in fact at my last appointment a could of weeks (11/12 weeks) when the doctor tried to find it, she couldn't. I wasn't freaked out about this, until I read that the above mentioned girl had heard hers.

I wasn't freaked out because, before my doctor even tried to find the it she said, "It's still pretty early, you're right on the cusp, but since you're on the skinny side, we might be able to hear it." and when she couldn't find it she said, "Don't worry, I'm not concerned. But since this is your first baby, I'm sure you're nervous, so you can either come back in two weeks and we can try with the doppler again, or we can order you an ultrasound."

I went with the ultrasound, we go on Tuesday! I'm excited to get to see our little love bean. Lesson learned, #1 thing I should NOT do while pregnant is compare my pregnancy to others. It's not worth the nerves, and if my doctor isn't worried, says I'm completely healthy and that everything is looking good, I should trust her.